Letting go of Pain
In this issue, we wish to share one of Swamiji’s most valuable lessons on living a peaceful and happy life. One of the things that often prevent us from doing so is the hurt we have experienced in the past.
Painful memories often raise their ugly heads and depress us. How can we escape from them?
Letting go of hurt and truly healing can be challenging for many. The past entangle us, and prevents us from living in the present moment. Swamiji, in one of his most popular books, 'Oh Mind, Relax Please!' talks of why it is difficult for any of us to let the past go. And what we can do to really make that happen. He begins by sharing some stories from his classes.
Very often, during 'LIFE Program' participants would share their inner traumas. I would also encourage them to speak. I used to ask them, ‘What is the injury that remains buried as a wound in your heart for a long time?'
One person said, 'My friend and I got together and started a civil contract business. Since I was in government service, I ran the firm in my friend’s name. Very soon, the business prospered. In order to concentrate on the work, I even resigned from my government job. Sometime later, for the purpose of filing income tax returns, I asked my friend for the account books of the company. And he said, 'Look for the work that you are doing, take whatever pay you want. But don't come here asking about accounts and so on!
I had given him the responsibility of running the company, including signing powers, fully trusting him. Now I was helpless! This was the company I had started by investing all that I had, including the money got by selling the family jewels. I simply wiped the tears of frustration from my eyes and walked out. All those years of hard toil and sweat were snatched from me in [an instant]. This happened to me many years ago. Later, I began another construction company, which is now yielding good profits. Yet, the treachery of my friend still makes me feel choked and tears well up in my eyes!'
Similarly, many poured out their past agonies and scars. I did not wish to answer their queries directly. Instead, I [asked them to] give me the name of a very boring movie that [they] disliked. Each one mentioned one movie or the other.
[Then I said to them], 'Alright! Now go, fetch the movie from a video parlour and watch it all through the night, again and again!'
'Oh no! I cannot do that! I would die of boredom! Tell me something else that I can do!' they all pleaded.
'Well, the treachery of friends, the torture of mother-in-law...[these ] are also painful scenes that you dislike immensely! Why do you insist on playing them and replaying them over and over again on the mental screen? While you refuse to watch an imaginary film that you merely dislike and find boring, how can you replay those scenes that you loathe on your mental screen? Allow yourself to forget them...they would dry up and the scar would vanish by itself!" I said.
The reason why small children are happy is because they do not carry burdens from the past...they forget painful incidents very quickly, but they bring up joyful memories again and again and enjoy them. We too should learn to be like children. That would considerably lessen the burden that we carry in our hearts.
To put all this in a nutshell, the past must only tutor us, not torture us!
In such a space, a hidden intelligence will surface which will guide us in a mysterious way.
Most of us are particular that our point of view should win rather than [us] being happy. Being happy is not our first priority. We must consider that our happiness is more important than our beliefs. 'What is the problem as long as our happiness and contentment are obtained through just means?'
Once we cultivate this attitude, there will be no dearth of energy and enthusiasm in our lives!
Managing LIFE Creatively - Hyderabad
For the first time 7 chapters at Hyderabad joined together to conduct Managing LIFE Creatively with the support of Mr. PSN and Mr. Padmanabhan.
The Koti chapter under Mr. Satish Kumar Darga was the lead chapter
Managing LIFE Creatively - Bangalore
For the first time, all 9 chapters at Bangalore joined together to conduct Managing LIFE Creatively.
The Basavanagudi chapter under Mrs. Shrikala Sampath assumed the lead chapter role for this program and made it successful.